The Dirty Dozen

Last night was a hot mess on American Idol. I will say that the final 12 are a unique blend of talent and no talent. However, at this point there is no excuse for forgetting the words to your songs. The finalists had the challenge of a lifetime in bringing Diana Ross songs to life. I especially give credit to the men for finding anything in her music book. She was extremely pleasant and mother hen-like to the singers but I did notice that they all called her Ms. Ross. Some did look her in the eye. Diana, I mean Ms. Ross must have mellowed over the years.

The judges have been amazingly honest and on point this season- even Paula. Despite her teary tirade following Melinda Doolittle’s performance, she has been much more in tune to technique. Simon as always has been honest. Randy has chilled out and now leans more toward Simon in thought.

Here’s my take on last night’s performances:

Brandon Rogers

This guy is so unremarkable I’m appalled. I think there is more talent in him but he fades in the crowd. Who forgets the word to You Can’t Hurry Love? He also has an annoying habit of smiling during every song. Happy or sad he’s smiling. He doesn’t connect with the words therefore he doesn’t connect with the audience.

Melinda Doolittle

Clearly the most expressive and diverse vocalist in this competition. I’m always surprised that more people don’t perform Home. When it’s done right, you get chills at the end. I got chills. I just hope voters remember this is a singing contest. I’m afraid she’ll be cast aside because she’s not a conventional beauty and looks old for her age. If you took her voice, Haley Scarnato’s body and Jordin Sparks energy, you’d have the dream contestant.

Chris Sligh

The Jack Osbourne clone made the mistake of re-working Endless Love into a Coldplay-esque tune. I appreciate the effort but he took the tenderness and meaning out of the song. If a song is truly great, you don’t have to rearrange the melody. It stands up on its’ own and your personal vocals help brand it not the music. He horribly missed the mark.

Gina Glocksen

I like the rocker chick. I hope she sticks around. She was one of the better singers of the evening but she missed the meaning in the song Love Child. She should have turned into the girl from the wrong side of the tracks and made the song grittier. Dirty.

Sanjaya Malakaar

Every year some unfortunate teenager is kept on longer than his talent and our ears can endure. This year, it’s Sanjaya. I can’t seem to get beyond his tiny frame and ever-changing locks. His voice is so frail you can barely hear it. His performance lacks energy and sucks the air out of the room. His rendition of Ain’t No Mountain High Enough made him look like reject from Sister Act II.

Haley Scarnato

Homegirl tried her best but managed to bungle the words to Missing You. On the parts she remembered, she had nice tone. She took her lumps like a pro. Simon was incredibly gentle with her by saying she wasn’t that bad and showed promise. It was painful watching her try to hold back tears.

Phil Stacey

This boy needs to grow hair. Whoever told him he rocks the Spock look, lied to him. His shiny forehead is distracting. His performance of I’m Gonna Make You Love Me was standard but he yells in order to get certain notes out. He’ll stick around another week.

LaKisha Jones

Kiki took the high road this week and delivered an awesome nuanced performance of God Bless the Child. I think she should have used the mic stand but that’s just me. She toned down her hair, clothes and big voice. She realized that the biggest voice doesn’t always win. Look at JHud. It’s nice to hear her voice show great range and inflection. Though, I have to say her weave looks like it’s made of plastic. Three things to spend the money on – ketchup, plastic surgery and a weave. Amen.

Blake Lewis

We get it. You Beat Box and Pop and Lock. Give us a freakin’ break. His manic stage presence doesn’t even create the needed energy to sell his songs. His rearranged Set Me Free was unnecessary. I once again appreciate the effort but adding extra beats doesn’t really make it a re-arrangement.

Stephanie Edwards

She attempted a tepid version of Love Hangover. She needs to stop the Beyonce runs and develop her own style. She missed the essence of the song, which is breathy and sexy. Plus all the fun is in the disco break where she could have danced and did some fun runs and ad-libs. She oversang the song.

Chris Richardson

You know I love me some Justin Timberlake but he has created a legion of funky white boys that want to bring SexyBack. The Boss could have been a spunky vibrant anthem but instead was riddled with half-completed runs and notes.

Jordin Sparks

Watch out for this teen. She can sing circle around all of the guys and a couple of the girls. She decided to slow it down with a horrendous ballad. I don’t know the name but she’s lucky that she has a great voice and bubbly personality because I thought it was boring.

The bottom three will be Sanjaya, Haley and Brandon. All three will have to eventually go but my hope is young Sanjaya will go softly into the night.

Who do you think will go?