Team Lachey All the Way

I may actually have to read the upcoming Elle magazine article in which Jessica Simpson dishes about Nick. The radio stations were all over it this morning. It seems the catalyst for ending her marriage was the movie The Notebook. She had been unsatisfied in her marriage and while watching this movie she realized that it wasn’t working with Nick. She goes onto say that she was devastated after seeing him with another woman after the break up.

I understand her heartbreak but didn’t she end the marriage? Didn’t she walk away? I may be indifferent to this situation but I’m surprised she cared that much. If you watched the show and unfortunately I did, it was apparent that she was too young and naïve for marriage. Nick doted on her and seemed to tolerate her ditzy manner but even he seemed dumbfounded by their relationship. There was love there but you could tell it wasn’t going to last. It was too public an affair to survive.

Which brings me back to The Notebook. It’s a splendid movie full of romance and emotion. Extreme chemistry. It also feeds the notion of a soul mate. That one person out there who completes you. I feel bad if she ended her marriage because she thought Nick wasn’t her soul mate. I’m not convinced that one soul mate exists in a lifetime. I think this is a romantic idea perpetuated in pop culture to sell books, movies, cards, candy, Valentine’s Day and HOPE. The hope that no matter how annoying you may be, there is one person as equally annoying out there for you.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m a romantic but life as taught me a few things. There is no such thing as one person that fulfills all your needs. First, you need to be happy and fulfilled on your own. You have to be your own soul mate. I also think you can find your soul mates in different areas of your life meaning hobbies, interests or even career. Soul mates perpetuate the stereotype of perfection, which doesn’t exist. I can find a kindred spirit in pop culture or movies. I think the point is to find someone who you have a lot in common with but also allows you to grow in other underdeveloped parts of your self.

Look at it this way. How many times have celebrities declared that they found their soul mate only to separate a few months or years later? An authentic relationship is based on the principle that no one is perfect. There will be arguments and disagreements. There will be alternating periods of hot amazing sex followed by platonic companionship. There must be respect for the individual and for the couple. Relationships are a work in progress with ever-changing boundaries but they’re not easy.

I hope Jessica learns to move forward and live a private life that is hers alone and not MTV’s. Moving onto John Mayer may be a mistake since he's a serious musician whose profile continues to rise. Also, I've often though that he may be one of these intense guys that gets really into you and watches you while you sleep. Slightly creepy.

Do you believe in soul mates?