Chachi Loves Joanie and Sandy and Patty and Sara

With the growing trend in celebrity or actually pseudo celebrity reality shows, it wasn’t surprising to see USA Today take a look at the upcoming onslaught of new shows. VH1 is banking on a Bret Michaels (yes, the former hunk of hair band Poison). I say former hunk because what was cute in 1988 is looking a little tired in 2007. From his insta-tan to his bleached stringy hair and trademark bandana; it’s a bit tragic. I can’t imagine he needs help getting chicks but obviously the idea of being in a mansion with 20 or so desperate ladies sounded appealing.

The best to come is Scott Baio is 45 … and Single on VH1. The title alone deserves an Emmy. The aging man whore is looking at his past to interpret why he has never married. They are going to interview ex-girlfriends. You know I’ll be all over that. Unfortunately, ABC in throwing their hat in the ring with Age of Love. You might have seen the previews for this in which 20-somethings and 40-somethings vie for the attention of a man. I can’t see this making it past a few episodes. It’s demeaning with shades of sadism. I’m not impressed. The Two Coreys on A & E will be worth a watch simply because I’m a child of the 80s. The Corey live together and learn together. How special.

In celebration of these spectacles in television viewing, I’ve compiled a list of the cream of the crop in celebrity television.

The Osbournes

Not only are they eccentric, liquor-soaked and vulgar, they also have snarky British accents. It was interesting following the logic and lives of this rock and roll brood. It also humanized Ozzy and showed as the shuffling and amusing old man that he is. With his hard living past, it a wonder can walk and feed himself. The Osbournes gave us hours and hours of TV gold.

Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica

I only watched the first season of this nightmare but it was apparent that Nick was way too down to earth for the indulged and sheltered Jessica. I could literally see him packing up his stuff when she didn’t understand that Chicken of the Sea is tuna. It was supposed to be a happy ending but turned into the beginning of the end of their marriage. Quite sad, really.

Being Bobby Brown/Breaking Bonaduce

These were the awkward shows where you knew you should turn it off but there’s something compelling about watching someone falling down especially a former child star with anger issues and a legendary singing diva with dependencies.

Flavor of Love

Would you kiss Flavor Flav for any amount of money? Hell no. Yet, the producers managed to find two seasons worth of skanks who were willing to put their lips on the line. Nasty. Though, it was great fun to mock the women.

Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-list

She may be a pain in the butt but I love her stories about run-ins with crazy celebrities. You can tell she’s as much a fan as we are. She knows how to spin a tale quite creatively. Love it!

What reality shows do you think are the best?