Movie Stars vs. Actors (Part 2-The Ladies)

It was brought to my attention that I didn't mention any women in my original Movie Stars vs. Actors post. Here we go:

Actors: Helen Mirren, Meryl Streep, Dame Judith Dench, Cate Blanchett and Jodie Foster

Movie Stars: Julia Roberts, Jennifer Lopez, Kate Hudson and Catherine Zeta-Jones

The Funky Hybrid: Reese Witherspoon, Parker Posey, Laura Linney, Amy Adams (watch her she's about to blow up) and Maggie Gyllenhaal

I was also asked about the following hard-to-place women:

Goldie Hawn-Movie Star
Susan Sarandon-Actor
Whoopi Goldberg- Movie Star

Rock Star finally has that 'Oh Shit' moment

Tropical Ernesto turned out to be a dud but Rock Star: Supernova sizzled Tuesday night. Someone must have reminded the rockers that they were boring the hell out of us and that it is a competition. Last night's result show was the bomb. We finally had a moment during the elimination but I'll get to that later.

Performance night was amazing. It was fan choice night and the rockers pulled out all the stops.

Magni rocked the hell out of I Alone by Live. I don't understand why he keeps getting voted in the bottom. It might be his flashes of Euro trash attitude. He tried to show some humor in his taped segment.

Lukas is still a make-up wearing troll as my friend T puts it. His version of Lithium did nothing for the Nirvana tune. If you watched the webisode, you'll see him pout about getting the song since he doesn't like Nirvana. That was kind of a dig at his fans.

Toby was red hot. Did he sing a song? I couldn't get over how good he looked. Yummy. Oh yea, he pulled fans on stage at the end. By fans I mean scanky veteran rock chicks.

Storm sang the hell out of Bring Me to Life by Evanescence. That's a tough son to tackle but as usual she pulled it out. It wasn't my favorite but she committed totally to it. Did I mention Toby did his little white-boy rappin' thing. It was cute.

Ryan was a little awky (that's awkward and ugly) in his performance. He sounded good on Clocks by Coldplay but his frantic running and climbing on the piano seemed desperate. He lost control of the mic a few times.

Dilana, my girl, was on singing Mother, Mother by Tracy Bonham. She simply takes it to another level. Jill sang this song earlier and it was a hot mess. I got it when Dilana sang it.


Elimination night was a trip. The bottom three were Ryan, Storm and (gasp!) Dilana. How she got there was a shock to me but whatever. I know I tried voting online for her and was unable to do so. Ryan stumbled through a Who song and was shown the door. Bye Bye.

Who's gonna win? I need to hear from my Rock Star devotees. I know you're out there. As always, my money is on Dilana. What do you think? I promise not to berate your choice. Wink. Wink.

Movie Stars vs. Actors

With Tropical Storm Ernesto hovering over South Florida, I've had time to a lot of time to think about movies and actors. With that said, I've had a belief for years that you have to either be an actor or a movie star. There is no in between. Who knew how wrong I would be?

Actors. They get the Oscar. When I think of the craft of acting, and it is an art, I think of Robert DeNiro, Al Pacino and Gregory Peck. True actors. Meaty, well written roles that gave you strong emotions. Happy or sad. Actors are well respected and command attention. They intimidate their contemporaries. Basically, they are what movie star strive to be.

Movie Stars. They make blockbusters and money. They would include Tom Cruise, Harrison Ford and Bruce Willis. This isn't to say that a Movie Star can't be in an actor's movie. Look at Cruise in Magnolia (love him in it!). It happens but it's rare and often feels like a watered down attempt. Movie Stars constantly have to worry about aging, popularity and ticket sales.

The Funky Hybrid. This is the newest addition to the collection and my favorite. These clever creatures roam freely between the two groups. Think Philip Seymour Hoffman, William H. Macy and John C. Reilly. They realize that diversity is key and that you can bring your top acting chops to a blockbuster movie. Who would have thunk it.

Emmys dazzle

I actually made it through the Emmy Awards without falling asleep. Conan was hilarious. Below are the highlights:

DRESSED TO IMPRESS
Evangeline Lily was divine in violet.
Jane Kaczmarek was a vision in red.

STYLE IMPAIRED
Jennifer Love Hewitt looked extremely busty and hippy in her sparkly dress.
Kyra Sedgwick was engulfed by a massive chiffon flower.

QUEER EYE AWARD
Katherine Heigl must have gotten some help from the fab 5. For a pretty girl she has a horrible sense of style.

BEST DIG
The South Park bit at the beginning was too funny as they once again tried to coax Tom Cruise out of the closet.

TISSUE MOMENT
Dick Clark broke my heart. He proved that America's oldest teenager still has heart.

WORST FACELIFT
Barry Manilow and that's saying a lot considering Joan Collins was there.

SEXIEST BROAD OVER 100
Cloris Leachman looked amazing.

YUMMIEST MAN OVER 50
Jeremy Irons with a capital Y.

MOST DESERVED WIN
Jeremy Piven. Let's hug it out bitch.

BIGGEST WHAT WERE THEY THINKING MOMENT
Passing over Hugh Laurie for House. How can you deny those blue eyes?

FUNNIEST BRITISH-ISM
Only Helen Mirren can deliver the line "I was afraid I was going to go tits over ass" while accepting an award with such class.

How can I get invited to the Playboy masion?

It's Sunday. The Lord's Day and Hef's. sunday mean a new The Girls Next Door. One thing you need to know about me is that I LOVE Hugh Hefner. Seriously, I'm not smiling right now. When I say LOVE, I mean that I admire his innovation and mind not his body or money. I would gladly sit at the hem of his satin pajamas. I enjoy my weekly foray into Hef and the girl's fantasy world. At least it seems like fantasy to me. Holly, Bridget and Kendra are a hoot. You know I must truly LOVE Hef because their flightiness doesn't bother me.

Holly is clearly the lead bitch who has designs on his sperm. She does seem to honestly love him but overestimates her role in his love history. She does have an eye for design and layout. Bridget is a sweetie. The professional student has much respect for Playboy and Hef. she know she's living her dream. Kendra is along for the ride and I ain't mad at her. Go get yours. She's young and having load of fun. Her goofy laugh says it all.

I've learned a lot from Hef. Check it out.

What I Learned From . . . Hugh Hefner


You gotta have vision

Here’s a man who had a vision of a magazine filled with nude women. Okay, this doesn’t sound very original. I’m sure there were thousands of young and old men before him that dreamed of such a magazine. However, none of them had the vision, creativity and tenacity to make it a reality. Hef (as all the hip insiders call him) knew it would take more than perky breasts and platinum blondes to guarantee a successful publication. Any pervert with a camera can sell snapshots of women in various stages of undress but only one could pepper those layouts with thought-provoking political and intriguing lifestyle articles. Who would have known dirty old men also have a penchant for the political process and the latest fashions?

Marketing can make the impossible possible

Hef has patented an entire lifestyle that centers on young beautiful nude women, late-night parties and sex; all while wearing his ultra-comfy silk pajamas. His famous mansion is a magical playground consisting of exotic animals, 24-hour butler service, darkly-lit grottos and an endless supply of bikini-clad co-eds. That’s the Playboy lifestyle. Right now, a middle-aged man in Idaho is trying to capture that same feeling and vitality. Unfortunately, living the Playboy life in middle America could lead to jail time but it’s the idea that one person makes it seem possible and in some circles normal. That’s marketing.

The Playboy brand has been linked with nightclubs, music festivals, casinos, television, movies and a magazine. Hef elevated what some saw as pornography to an elegant art form. Playboy bunnies are presented as sexy, sensuous and often flirtatious in that innocent girl-next-door manner as opposed to their contemporaries who capitalize on cheap crotch shots of slightly trampy-looking girls.

Agreements

I’m a strong believer in agreements. All relationships have them. Hef loves gorgeous young women and gorgeous young women love Hef. This is an agreement. They agree to be his eye candy and companions; he agrees to care for them and keep them in luxurious style. It’s a win-win situation. But the problem with agreements is that not everyone approves of these arrangements. I personally couldn’t be involved with 80-something Hef. While I find him an innovative business pioneer and fascinating pop culture icon, I find it slightly creepy to be in a sexual relationship with someone who clearly recalls the Great Depression. But as long as his girlfriends are of legal age and he’s not impeding my lifestyle, what do I care? After all, it’s his agreement.

The people at Survivor have lost their damn minds

WHAT!!! If you haven't heard already, the idiotic people producing Survivor decided it would be a brilliant idea to divide the survivors into tribes based on race. RACE. Meaning there will be a black tribe, Asian tribe, Hispanic tribe and white tribe. I don't know that this is racist as much as it is a shameless marketing ploy. What's the purpose? To prove that these groups can survive in the wild. Hello, African savannah, rural China and South American rainforest. These groups have already proved that they are survivors.

This show just threatens to divide America further. What are the challenges? Hopefully, not based on stereotypes. Will the blacks have to face snakes adn swimming? Will the Asians have to do long division? Will the Hispanics have to pimp out their boat? Will the white tribe have to overcome their irrational fear of the other tribes?

And what kind of person would be part of this production. Oh, that's right the majority of these people are in the entertainment industry. That's right. They're all actors and poor misguided individuals who are looking for their 15 miutes of fame. As a minority, I'm appalled and disgusted. While I adore reality tv, I hate the calibur of people that crawl out of the woodwork for some of these programs. Hello, Flavor of Love or should I say Flavor of Strippers and other Women with Severe Low Self-esteem.

I call on everyone to boycott this show. What's next? Tribes based on religion, hair color or income. That's absolute crap and you know it. Fuck that.

World trippin'

In the past week, I've seen two interesting documentaries that take you around the world. I love documentaries that show you different walks of life or give you a bird's eye view to something. I don't want to be preached to or view a one-sided film. To me documentaries should show life unfold naturally and then edited to tell a story.

Yo Soy Boricua, Pa' Que Tu Lo Sepas directed by Rosie Perez. That's right the busty Nuyorican directed a gem on Puerto Rican pride and culture. It had special interest to me since by husband is a proud Boricua born on the island. I was mostly impressed with the archival footage that illustrated pivatol moment in PR history. I had no idea that by 1965 the US goverment had sterilized a third of the PR women. WOW. I also admired the way she portrayed the colorful PR people without making them cartoon characters of salsa music and cars with booming systems.

Favela Rising directed by Jeff Zimbalist and Matt Mochary was an honest and sometimes tense look inside the Brazilian slums. The documentary follows the rise of Afro Reggae, an eclectic group of musicians that tapped into their African roots to form the Public Enemy of the favelas. Even with the Portuguese subtitles, I was riveted. Afro Reggae started programs for the slum kids and adults that broadened their worlds and is bringing peace to the most turbulant neighborhood of Rio de Janeiro. Their fearless leader Anderson Sa is a Malcolm X (after he left the Nation) for the favela youth.

I highly suggest both of these documentaries for a different slice of life.

Human nature is a bitch

My guilty pleasure has led me down a path of discovery. That's right my weakness for reality TV has changed my life. I was watching Project Runway and Rock Star: Supernova last night when it hit me. HUMAN NATURE IS A BITCH!!!

What other way is there to explain Dilana and Jeffrey's decision to (as my mom says) show their asses in front of millions of viewers. I watched the webisode where my homie and kindred spirit Dilana spilled the beans on her fellow rockers. Let's call it like it is. She not only spilled the beans, she threw them under the bus and ran over them a few times. There was an uncomfortable moment of silence where her mind ALMOST told her to stop. Everything just poured out of her mouth. But dammit, that human nature will get you every time. WHAT was she thinking? She is a front runner for the gig. Her lapse of judgment and loose lips could cost her everything and make her look like a diabolical witch in the process.

Jeffrey on the other hand lost is damn mind. Not only did he select Angela's mother. He ignored her input as the client and berated her to the point of tears. I'll tell you if that was my mother I would have cut him. Believe me if he had chosen my mother, he would have had to sleep with one eye open. She would have come for him. The insane thing is that Angela's mother was this timid soft-spoken lady. He got it in his head that she was trying to undermind his design and went all crazy on her ass. Human nature spanked him and not in a good way.

While I attribute the above behavior to human nature, the underlying problem may be the simple fact that these people are ASSHOLES. There I said it. Reality tv simply brings out the ass in you, which is the reason I will never do one of these shows. I mean what if you think you're a cool chilled individual only to find out that you're an ASSHOLE. Talk about devastating. I don't think I could handle it. I'm bad enough with my quirks like I don't let people look at my magazines before I do. I don't like people touching or breathing on my food (and this is getting worse as I get older). What happens if someone passes me a cookie with their bare hands? I'll lose my shit. I'm by no means saying that I'm perfect but I like to keep my OCD ways to myself, family and lucky friends.

I think the only answer to breaking the asshole curse goes back to kindergarten. The golden rule. Do unto others as you'd have to them unto you. Think. If someone called me a republican would I get mad? Hell yes!! So I won't call you one. Come to think of it, couldn't we apply this to all areas of our life?

Top Gun crashes

First, may I say goodbye to Ms. Patrice. The fellas of Supernova finally let her go peacefully in the night. No more uncomfortable "Soccer Mom Reliving Her Golden Years" moments.

Well, well. I couldn't let this go without mention. Tom Cruise was finally called on his bizarre behavior. Finally. Can you imagine how bad his behavior has been for Paramount to drop his sorry ass? I think everyone sensed that he had jumped the shark when he bounced on Oprah's couch. I think this is the beginning of the end. It's over.

I've never been a Cruise fan but I started to warm to him after MI:2. It was probably seeing him hugged up on the diva Newton. Who would have know he was down with the swirl? And I will admit it here that he was amazing in Magnolia. With that said, I think he had it coming. You can only alienate and talk down to people while pushing your faux-religion and overbearing ideas for so long. He can turn this around but he's going to have to seriously humble himself.

If I seem distracted in this posting, it's because I'm watching Project Runway. It's a trip. Jeffrey is a complete asshole. Gotta run the runway is calling.

Rockers lack spark

Rock Star: Supernova was lackluster last night. While I bobbed my head occasionaly, I only threw my horns up once. Thanks Magni. Here's the long and short of it:

Patrice
Her original song "Beautiful Thing" was okay but more suited for Lilith Fair. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I just can't shake the fact that she looks like a soccer mom with a past. She sounds great but doesn't bring energy to the stage.

Magni
His version of "Smells Like Teen Spirit" was dark and slightly creepy but represented the song well. He performed with the angst of a teenager in the ghettos of Iceland. Okay I doubt there are slums in his native land but if there were, the kids would love it. Also, is it just me or does he look like a bizarro Bono.

Ryan
His original "Back of Your Car" was surprisingly good. Unfortunaely, his brooding alt-rock persona doesn't fit Supernova. His vocals are good but his squinty eyed performances look like he's playing a rocker in a bad USA network movie.

Storm
She killed Aerosmith's "Cryin". The girl can sing anything but I think the show's stylist have cleaned her up to much. With her tatoos covered and tacky 80s eyeliner missing, she looks like Rock Star Barbie.

Dilana
That's my homie. Her version of The Police's "Every Breath you Take" was great. It wasn't my fav of her performances but she has managed to show depth and versatility. She's the front runner. What was up with the mother story.

Toby
Well, mate. His version of "Layla" was average. It was a little to gentle for my liking in the beginning. Everyone knows that great guitar lick and it was buried in the middle of the song. He's hot and had a great start but his days are numbered. I think he's a frat boy in hiding.

Lukas
My little troll doll. He's unique and interesting but he sings like he has marbles in his mouth. He started off clear and precise on The Killers' "All These Things I've Done." He soon reverted to his mumble mouthed ways. But he has a following and will make it to the end. He is entertaining in all of his smeared eyeshado glory.

Patrice MUST leave the show tonight.

Get the Led Out

It's Tuesday. You know what that mean. RockStar Supernova. My guilty pleasure besides Taco Bell and cheesy 70s lite music is reality tv. I know sistas aren't supposed to rock but I can get my horns up with the best of them. I like to buck convention and what's expected of me. For the record. I am funny, love fried chicken and can dance. However, I can swim, graduated college and I didn't get pregnant in high school Go figure. I'm a complicated figure.

I'm a tad high-brow when it comes to my reality selections. I enjoy shows that have a clear goal that is substantial. Forget those classless tramps on Flava of Love or those emotional twits on The Bachelor. I breathe for American Idol, America's Next Top Model, Project Runway and of course RockStar. I even have my husband watching them.

My RockStar pick is Dilana while hubby is rooting for Lukas the troll doll. Dilana is that perfect comination of scary tatoos, smoky voice and powerhouse performance. On top of that, she's mature enough to make the Supernova veterans look a few years younger than the Stones.

I'm calling out all RockStar groupies. Who's your favorite?

Lately, I've been thinking about Paris Hilton. I guess I really don't have a choice since she's been on this hideous PR blitz for her new "album." There's a lot to learn from sweet Paris.

What I Learned From . . . Paris Hilton

Talent is optional

There’s a new pathetic craze that has ravaged pop culture and American society where individuals become famous for doing nothing. In some cases, people become famous for jet-setting the world in search of the ultimate party and hot men. In Paris’ case, she backed her way into fame. She was famous for her party girl persona before she turned her attention to acting and singing. It’s usually done the other way around. Meanwhile, she’s giving hope to marginally talented girls across the world who feel all they need is a cute face, skinny body and a catchphrase to obtain fame and popularity. Forget higher education, character development and honing special skills and talents. Thanks Paris.


High society is in demise

Remember when socialites were classy sophisticated ladies who lunched, wore smart designer suits and owned expensive family jewels. They never showed bare legs, made sex tapes or wore micro-mini skirts. There seemed to be rules of etiquette and composure. Paris must have the old guard choking on their cucumber sandwiches. Debutantes used to exude and air of elegance and privilege. They would never be caught without a bra or eating fast food. It’s a sad day when the ultra-rich want to live their life like they just escaped from a trailer park. Just think of those girls living in a double wide who would give anything for a taste of that cucumber sandwich.


Never make a sex tape

Only in America can making a sex tape bring you any kind of positive notoriety and fame. Why do people especially famous people insist in making sex tapes? Is their ego that big that they need to actually see themselves nailing the starlet or hottie? Isn’t it enough to know you nailed them? Do you have to view it over and over again? Besides if you want to watch people having sex, you can buy those tapes already made. Never, never, never, never and I repeat never make a sex tape. If there’s one thing we can learn from Pamela Anderson, never make a sex tape (and take it easy with the super-sized implants). And if you simply must make one, keep it strapped to your chest at all times. Never let anyone else have access to it or better yet destroy it immediately after the first viewing. You’ll thank me later.

I have a confession. My closest friends and family already know but I've finally decided to make that first step. Even they don't know how bad it is. I figure by going public, I might be able to help others. My secret has kept me up at night and at times made me a recluse. But I'm prepared to finally go public and confess my deepest secret.

I'm a pop culture junkie. There. I said it.

My earliest memories are watching the Carol Burnett Show and going to the movies with my mother and sister. I cut my teeth on the Young and the Restless and graduated to Desperate Housewives. Pop culture has always been an icebreaker and area of expertise for me. I got my first subscription at 12-years-old to Glamour magazine. While my friends in college were reading world history, I was racing to the mailbox for my weekly fix of the Star tabloid. It seemed only fitting that one of my first jobs out of college was at the National Examiner, a job that satisfied my hunger of gossip and my thirst for pop culture.

In a world where my 60-something mother knows Justin is dating Cameron, it’s not hard to see the influence pop culture has on us daily. The average person learns a lot from the trials and tribulations of celebrities; after all they are people just like us. They just live life with a more expensive haircut and higher thread count on their bed sheets.

With that said, here I go. Thanks for being with me as I popped by blog cherry.